On this subject I found two quotes that I think should point the way:

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"We want to make sure that we don't annoy the young horse and not spoil its friendly grace. Because this is like the scent of flowers, which never returns once it has evaporated." 

Antoine De La Pluvinel

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Mr Antoine De La Pluvinel speaks here from the heart. That’s exactly the experience I’ve had. Horses that are disciplined without being able to see the reason for themselves or that are exaggeratedly withdrawn for fear of lively, dynamic, lively reactions lose their esprit and shine. Grace and the scent of flowers naturally sound even more beautiful.  

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I have already ridden in a lot of horses and always try to make it as stress-free as possible for the horse. The horse should gain trust and approach every little step in training with serenity and curiosity. It all starts with handling, cleaning, getting used to the saddle and lunging. When lunging, I attach great importance to the fact that the horse reacts to subtle aids in connection with the voice. The voice aid is taken back in the course of the training, but is very useful when breaking in.  

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"You cannot do without rebuke, but rebuke limits, reward expands." 

Gerhard Roth, neurobiologist, philosopher

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Unfortunately, this is often forgotten when riding. "No punishment is praise enough." Actually a joke, but praising riders are rare. From a learning psychological point of view, it is known that punishment blocks and praise strengthens. I also use this when breaking in young horses, who thank you very much. Of course, it does not work without consistency and reproach, but it is important that it is always understandable for the horse, otherwise it will become numb and slip into a learned helplessness or a power struggle will arise which must be avoided.

I want the horse to have fun at work and trust the rider. My goal is a hard-working horse in all three basic gaits that leans against the rider's hand, willingly reacts to the rider's aids and awaits them with curiosity.